2008 in hindsight

I think it was Dickens who reflected, when looking at a beggar on the sidewalk one day, "There, but for the grace of God, goes I," or words to that effect. What he meant was that it was only the kindness of God that kept him from poverty, sickness, destitution and gave him material comfort, success and happiness.

It was not a comment in a Christian sense on what truly is God's blessing. He does not mean that just because we are doing badly physically that we are not blessed spiritually. No, he was only commenting on how all god things come from God and we as human beings cannot boast in what we have, what we have accomplished or even who we are. We are in good shape by the kindness and generosity of God alone.

Looking back on 2008, I can only say that nothing good - and some things very good - had come about because I deserved it or have earned it. Just thinking about my wife's patience and forgiveness and the coming of Emmanuelle, the support from friends and families, being granted a job for 4 years, seeing people at church and bible study grow, seeing how family and friends experience the goodness of God through trials - just thinking about these things made me realize just how "blessed" I am and those of my Christian friends are.

Mistakes, big and small, marked so much of the year. And I just wonder what in God's mind and heart kept Him forgiving, patient and even encouraging toward a fool such as I? Again, but for the grace of God. Perhaps I ought to point out more specifically how God did not condemn me in my weakness but instead, reminded me that He is God, the same faithful, persevering and loving Father that sends His one and only Son for the sins of the world who is against Him. I think that it is particularly in reminiscing my own weaknesses that I am more thankful for who my God is. Yet this is not the place for specifics, especially if my foolishness has affected others. But needless to repeat, I can't boast in my thoughts, character, achievement or being throughout the events of 2008; I'm just thrilled to still be a forgiven sinner.

In contrast, blessings are easier to name specifically. On top of the list I have mentioned, I ought to add the gift of true friends, the joy I receive in His word of promise given by Scripture, the hope of justice in His new Heaven and Earth, material comfort and so the ability to give, reconciliation of some sort with a lost friend, great teaching from my home church, the Spirit's work in my non-christian family members, God's keeping and maturing of my christian family members, exciting times of "regeneration" of many Christian friends, and the list just keeps expanding. To be brutally honest, I can have nothing to complain about, God has blessed me abundantly, I lack nothing at all in this life or the next. And it's not only me, it applies to so many fellow Christian friends.

I must remember here one of Mark Driscoll's talk on the prayer of Jesus. The main point was: prayer is about asking God's will, not my own; it's not about our own plans or desires, but about His desire and plan. Through any event or life-stage, and I sense that hardship will come sooner than I know it, God's promise still stands: He is with us who depend on Him, He may not give us what we ask or take away any earthly pain or disaster from us, but He promises to be with us until the end of the age (Matthew 28:20). Of course in the next age, there is no more sin, no more death and no more horrors of the curse.

So because of the Lordship of Jesus, who is Emmanuel or God dwelling with us, 2009 will display just as much and if not more of God's grace and faithfulness. For that I'm grateful and very excited.